In the middle of the night...

...I go walkin' in my sleep (sung to the tune of of Billy Joel's "River of Dreams", though not really singing, more like dragging).

...

It's been a long time since Levi has woken up in the middle of the night. He usually doesn't, or if he does it's for a 2-minute (or so) whine fest and then he's back to sleep.

This week, though, he caught the Hand, Foot, and Mouth virus. How, when, and where I have no clue.

It started Sunday night with a wake in the middle of the night, sweats, and small chills. I wasn't sure what to make of it, so I soothed him, gave him water, and put him back to bed.

The fever continued to rise with each day and Monday night we took him to the doctor.

We are all shocked that he has made it 20 months without getting sick (well, this kind of sick). He caught the flu bug over the winter like the rest of us, too. But this is a true-toddler kind of sick.

We have been lucky.

He fairs things well, Levi. He is a good sport even when given ibuprofen and taking his temperature, though he does get a little scared. And I think he has a pretty good immune system.

This is one week where I am SO thankful for Isaac and I's schedules the way they are. While I'm usually griping and moaning about how we're mostly catching eachother in passing on the way out the door, this time I'm glad for how our lives are arranged.

Isaac is on his 5-day-in-a-row off stint (I know, right?! Rude.) so he has been able to be home with Levi all week.

Hand, Foot, and Mouth is a weird little monster. It starts with fevers, chills, sweats, etc., just like he had it, and then moves into blisters in the mouth causing a sore throat and potential blisters on the feet, hands, and butt. We haven't seen any of those.

When your child is sick you feel helpless. "Why aren't they eating? Why do they keep wanting to be held? Why are they crying for you at 3 in the morning?" Etc.

One of the reasons I picked Crestwood Pediatrics is because they are open in the evening. And thankfully, we were able to get him seen Monday night and the diagnosis was made.

Through all of this I realized something about myself: I despise the middle of the night.

Ok. I like it when I'm on a road trip or staying up to watch a movie, or when I'm at the beach with my sisters and brother-in-laws and we're playing Pictionary and dying of laughter until 3 in the morning. But other than that, I am not a big fan of it.

One of my biggest struggles with the newborn phase was the "nights." As we all know, babies don't develop sleeping patterns until about 3 months or so and even then, it's an uphill battle with night feedings and oddball wakeups for no reason at all. It's hard.

It's lonely and stressful too. Getting up in the night with a baby (or a toddler) by yourself is scary. I'll say it. I said it. It gets me on edge. Especially when there's something wrong and I don't know what it is! And let's face it, I'm "mom" not "supermom." I get tired and groggy and I like my sleep.

But take Isaac for example. Does he need a lot of sleep to run on? That I am not convinced. His fuel is, well, I don't know what his fuel is.  Feelings of responsibility? Coffee?

Let's just say that he is much better at waking up in the middle of the night for things than I am.

So, we've gone back to good ol' memory lane on infant street this week. All those feelings of 2AM cries and calls for help have made their appearance again in my cute little almost two-year-old. And while it's always hard rolling out of bed in the wee hours I do seem to take one look at his little face and fall in love all over again. And all those feelings rush away.

The end is here.

As I sit here working from home, sipping coffee and writing to you while my little one (with his first fever ever) watches Elmo, I am happy to report that my school work at Shenandoah University is officially done (fingers crossed there's nothing else I have to fix on my portfolio!).

This spring and lead-into summer has been a huge hump. One that I am confident has taught me many lessons, not just in my newly obtained education, but on the home front as well. Being alone night after night while Isaac worked or was at drill was often hard to juggle amidst housework, caring for Levi, and continual impending schoolwork doom. He still works nights, of course, but I am now more free to shift my focus back solely on things at home like meal planning, housework and house projects, and reading books for pleasure. I am still job hunting though. More on that later...

Also with the close of school, Isaac's two-week annual Army trip ended the same day. He has two more months of Army, all together, and then his term is over. It's very bittersweet, but will honestly be a huge relief to have him home on the weekends he's actually supposed to be home! And to not have to ask mom to watch him anymore on the ones that included a Friday day away.

Chapters are closing all around us.

And hopefully new ones are opening....

I've been on several interviews this spring already, consisting of a couple elementary schools in Woodbridge, and one high school in Manassas, located right around the corner. I got wind of the closings on the elementary schools last week, and am waiting to hear about the local one hopefully this week. Wanna hear something weird? I saw the principal of the Manassas school at the restaurant at dinner last night!! We exchanged awkward hello's and that was that.

Family and friends alike are all teaching me more about patience and trust through this process. Because, as we know, I'm probably one of the most anxious people you'll meet and if I don't have my ducks in a row, I squirm. A lot.

I just have to know that through this, God has a plan. He always does. Why would I ever doubt Him in that? He's never failed me before so why would He now? And if it's not the one I thought was intended, it'll be something else. Better.

I'm also learning about confidence. The whole application and interview process is rigorous, arduous, long, slow, red tape-ish, and creates a head-banging effect. It. Is. Hard. It's true what they say: you're a needle in a haystack. You've gotta get your name out there, know people, meet people, get your foot in the door. Etc. But how the heck do you do it if you know absolutely no one and have nothing to stand on? I have no freakin' clue. You just wing it and hope for the best.

Fortunately, I've made contact with the PE Supervisor for PWCS and he's been helping me get along a bit. I'm thankful for the relationship we have formed thus far and am hopeful something will come of it.

If not, and for whatever reason nothing happens this fall, I'll learn to be ok and perhaps look into other avenues where the Lord leads.

I'm also seeking positions in Fauquier County, Frederick County, and Loudoun County. The hard part about this would be the commute. Isaac and I want to move eventually though, and this is another great part of our future: we don't know where we're going!!

I really don't know what the Lord has in store, where He will have us go, or if we'll be staying put right here for a while. I do know, however, that I'm so grateful for this semester to be over, for our schedules to be on the path to somewhat normal again, for more free time to spend with Levi, more time to cook, more time to read, and a loving, heavenly Father who hasn't left my side. Ever.

What I do know is that I had that glass of wine (Passaggio Sauvignon Blanc to be exact!), bowl of popcorn, and date with SATC this weekend and it was wonderful!

I also know that we have a lot of great stuff to look forward to this summer like my road trip to Nashville to visit Leslie, a trip to NYC to celebrate our anniversary, our annual yard sale, a visit from both in-laws, a family high school graduation party, a trip to the zoo, and my TV Shows -- you know I love my Bachelorette and SYTYCD!!

Needless to say, I could not wait for school to be done and summer to be here.

With the close of this post, the words to one of my favorite childhood prayer songs comes to mind: "For the Lord is good to me, and so I thank Him for...giving me the things I need. The sun and the rain and the appleseed. The LORD IS GOOD TO ME. Amen, amen, amen-amen-amen!"