Hello, beautiful!

This morning, I was driving to work thinking about all the things that annoy me.

Traffic. Rude drivers.Traffic. Going to work, period. THE LIST. Of the things in my head that I need to do that I don't know what to start with...

So much of my life is spent thinking. Because frankly, a lot of it is spent driving.

Thinking about things I want and need to do or become, and how I can integrate them into my life.

About coordinating my schedule with Isaac's. With Levi's.

How will I find the time to study for more training or let alone, clean my house? When we are ready to have a second child, how will we provide care for it when I go back to work? Will I have to go back to work?

Why is my job so lame? That's utterly out of category, but still a poignant thought.

Etc.

I am overwhelmed with scheduling - and conflicts among it. Finding time and energy to do the things that have to get done, much less that I want to get done, has become a common thorn in my side.

When will I find time to read those blog sites I saved? Read the book I bought? Teach a class?

As society always says - and by society I mean my sisters and I - HOW DO PEOPLE DO IT?

Last night I decided to take a jog/walk with my son. Normally, I gear myself up, put my stopwatch on, the works. But I said to myself, "no, you must enjoy this walk even if it means you don't get the workout you want."

I was worried about coming home in time to cook dinner and give Levi a bath and prepare my lunches for the week.

I was worried worried worried.


You see, it has to be perfect. Everything. Dinner, bath time, bottle time. The house must be clean before I go to bed.

Instead of letting it go and enjoying a walk with Levi - a crisp, cool, fall walk - I worry, thinking I cannot get all of it done.In return, I don't enjoy it.

I'm getting better.

I went for that walk. Levi loved it. And I picked up mom halfway and she walked me back. Good company, fresh air. Great times.

So this morning as I continued my annoyance fest, "How Great Thou Art" by Carrie Underwood slammed itself in my face on the radio.

Hello beautiful!

As I listened to her sing the words with less than effort, I remembered that He is great. And worthy. And that is all that matters on a daily basis.

#1 - The best job in the world I can do is be a mother to my son. That's what God called me to do. And that's what He wants me to do, so I better do it and stop worry about things I cannot change.

#2 - God, in all His greatness, will guide my steps. He controls me. He loves me. And if I desire things to change, or not to change - or whatever it is - He will help me. He will help me, He will help me, He will help me.