Daily bodily womanhood maintenance:
BEFORE WORK: Wash face. Brush teeth. Smooth Away stray hairs. Take vitamins. Brush hair. Straigten (or curl) hair. Apply makeup (foundation, bronzer, shimmer, blush, eyeshadow, mascara and lip gloss). Reapply lotion. Pick out outfit. Put jewelry on.
DURING WORK: Balance the coordination of walking in heels while carrying 8 bags. Reapply chapstick hourly. Reapply hairspray at least twice.
AFTER WORK: Take jewelry off. Change into sweats. Shower (including shaving legs and armpits, and washing and conditioning hair). Brush teeth again. Apply bronzer lotion. Apply regular lotion. Blowdry hair.
Not including other daily dutes: making the bed, feeding the cat, folding any laundry in the dryer, making dinner, feeding the cat, doing the dishes, packing lunches for the following day, feeding the cat.
Weekly/Monthly bodily womanhood maintenance: eyebrow waxes, keeping toes and fingernails trimmed, filed, and painted, coloring hair, going to the gym to keep our deteriorating bodies fit, dealing with Aunt Flo. Need we say more?
Daily bodily manhood maitenance:
BEFORE WORK: Brush teeth. Grab pre-made lunch.
DURING WORK: Pee.
AFTER WORK: Brush teeth. Shower.
Not including other daily duties: play video games.
Weekly/Monthly bodily manhood maintenance: hair cuts.
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