I Love Him Through and Through

Tonight I was supposed to go to a seminar on "Creating and Living Your Vision." My mom had volunteered to watch Levi from her normal time at 3, all the way until 9, when I would be getting home. She had volunteered because she wanted me to go - to experience all that the class has to offer. She is such a great supporter.

And I wanted to go.

But a part of me felt guilty for having to leave Levi. And not that Grandma (or Nanny I like to call her, but she doesn't like it 'cuz it makes her feel old, she says) isn't the most suitable candidate to watch him, but I don't get to see him all day (plus he was extremely fussy today). And on top of feeling guilty, I desperately miss him by the time 5 o'clock rolls around.

So I stayed home.

I needed his cheeks. I longed for his smile. I missed him so much.

I think I will hopefully make it to one of the next three sessions when Isaac is off, but for tonight I just wanted to be home and be a part of our nightly routine.

We have it down, me n' Leaves.

Part of our nightly routine includes reading books. And tonight I picked one that a friend, who also has a child, gave us.

And as I held him and read the book...while he grabbed the thick cardboard pages and tried to put them in his mouth (all the while not having a clue what I'm reading him), he let me love him, and snuggle him.

It was worth staying home.

The words of the book are simple, but sweet. A reminder of how we love our children and what we love about them:

"I love you through and through.

I love your top side. I love your bottom side.

I love your inside and outside.

I love your happy side, your sad side, your silly side, your mad side.

I love your fingers and toes, your ears and nose.

I love your hair and eyes, your giggles and cries.

I love you running and walking, silent and talking.

I love you through and through...yesterday, today, and tomorrow, too."

Every time I read this to him I get sentimental because the little boy in the book reminds me of Levi - teeny with light-colored hair.

I can't believe how much I love him. And how one night away from him breaks my heart.

Morning time is our time, and evening time is our time. He's my little buddy that I drag around the house with me while I'm putting deoderant on or doing the dishes. And any time I get with him I cherish.

I love coming home to remnants of his day with Daddy, too. Because even though we can't always be together as a family each night, we leave trails of our day...

These are the trails left for me. Trails that prove a day well spent wrapped in love and play.

My buddies.